tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37793765958633193082024-02-25T23:03:12.645-08:00Penny DreadnoughtInsidious Indoctrination Engine of the Abominable GentlemenAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02264075796596433731noreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-91437742805093501332012-10-31T11:34:00.001-07:002012-10-31T11:36:51.678-07:00Penny Dreadnought Omnibus! Volume 1 Paperback<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The Abominable Gentlemen are the worst people you don't know.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">And the first Omnibus of their works is now available as a paperback (<a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Penny-Dreadnought-Omnibus-1-ebook/dp/B008HLQKXA/ref=sr_1_7?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1351706889&sr=1-7">UK</a> | <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1480112224/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=1480112224&linkCode=as2&tag=dietpillingr-20">US</a>) as well as an ebook (<a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Penny-Dreadnought-Omnibus-1-ebook/dp/B008HLQKXA/ref=sr_1_7?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1351706889&sr=1-7">UK</a> | <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Penny-Dreadnought-Omnibus-1-ebook/dp/B008HLQKXA/ref=sr_1_7?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1351706889&sr=1-7">US</a>).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i>Penny Dreadnought Omnibus! Volume 1</i> contains all sixteen stories from the first four volumes of Penny Dreadnought, as well as a bonus gallery of alternative cover art. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">It makes the perfect holiday gift for friends and family, especially strange 'Uncle Pete' who you only ever see at occasional family gatherings and who doesn't seem to be allowed near pets, children, or real cutlery.</span><br />
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Enjoy.</div>
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James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-23593690821435740222012-09-05T12:25:00.001-07:002012-09-05T12:26:07.228-07:00Honorary Abominable Gentlemen #3: Mark West<br />
<a href="http://www.thisishorror.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/the-mill-mark-west.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://www.thisishorror.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/the-mill-mark-west.jpg" width="150" /></a>This interview takes place in the Jekyll & Hyde pub which is the Abominable Gentlemen's local (no matter where you live, it's <i>your </i>local, too) so the first question we are asking <a href="http://markwestwriter.blogspot.co.uk/">Mark West</a> is: What are you drinking?<br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">I would be drinking something soft (I’m teetotal) and whilst my choice would be Coke, my new get-fit-regime would dictate that it should be diet, or zero. I haven’t drunk alcohol in years, the only time I was tempted was seeing Kylie as the Absinthe Fairy in “Moulin Rouge”. Actually no, maybe it wasn’t being tempted to drink…</span><br />
<span style="color: #20124d;"><br /></span>Introduce yourself - as writers, we often get asked for boring factual author bios. If you could write an author bio unconstrained by the boundaries of reality and truth, what would it say? <br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">Mark West is a lazy git, who spends all of his time thinking and talking about writing, then actually spends about five minutes a day doing it. Sometimes, he would rather re-sort his bookshelves, do the hoovering or sort the whites and dark colours into separate washing piles than actually do any writing. </span><br />
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If you had a Mister Hyde style alter-ego what would he/she be called and why? <br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">I already have - he’s called Pete and he writes stuff that I, as a family man, would never dare to! </span><br />
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'Literary horror' - oxymoron or your bread & butter as a writer? <br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">I’m a big fan of literary fiction, in that I love to read it but find it difficult to write - my tastes seem much more simple than the pared back style required. Having said that, horror is a very wide spectrum, even if you don’t class it as literary or otherwise - you have the beautiful, quiet horror of Charles Grant, the in-your-face stuff (such as early Clive Barker, which I would argue is actually literary) and all points in between. </span><br />
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The Penny Dreadnought art features people-with-telescopes-for-eyes. What low-tech body adornment or extension would you like? <br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">As a kid in the 70s, I was always impressed with Steve Austin’s accoutrements, so I’ll go with either bionic legs or the bionic eye (and I can argue that it’d be low-tech because, hey, he only cost $6m! </span><br />
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If you could make any one person - alive or dead, male or female, real or fictional - an honorary Abominable Gentleman, who would it be and why? <br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">My son Matthew, because he’s the coolest Dude I know. </span><br />
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Let's bitch - we partially came up with the idea of Penny Dreadnought in reaction to a lot of the 'sparkly vampire' school of supernatural writing. What about writing or publishing today makes you want to scream? <br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">Wow, that’s a wide canvas. My main ‘I’m-gonna-scream’ would be people expecting overnight success, without paying any of their dues. When I first started getting published, around 1999, there were plenty of print small press zines out there (in fact, it’s where I first came across a lot of writers I’m now friends with). You sent in your stories, you read the zines, you talked, you worked and - hopefully - you improved. You could self-publish, of course, but it was expensive and the results often looked poor, so instead, everything went through an editing process. Now we have dingbats who write a story (and leave it in first draft), slap on some terrible cover art with unreadable fonts, spam every possible Facebook group and messageboard and Twitter feed and then complain that they’re not being treated as ‘special’. The horror boom in the 70s and 80s, in traditional print, brought the genre to its knees (looks like Fifty Shades is going to do that for erotica) and we’re still dragging ourselves out of the mess. A lot of these writers have no real love or desire for the genre, it’s seen as easy (strip that girl down to her undies and chop this other girls head off!) and that nobody will care if it’s rough and ready. Not true, on any count. I don’t have an issue with self-publishing (it can be done very well and for examples of that I’d point to <a href="http://www.colinfbarnes.com/">Colin F Barnes</a> and Greg James, who writes as<a href="http://www.gryeates.co.uk/"> G R Yeates</a>), I don’t have an issue with people learning the ropes (hey, we were all there once), I have an issue with our “I want it now” culture, where people think that literary success is deserved and just around the corner. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">The sparkly vampires thing is something I definitely rail against, though you have to be careful that it’s not just a case of you not liking something that other people do (I, for instance, hate The X Factor but a lot of people apparently not only like it, but buy into its crass lies and spend money on the phone calls and CDs). Having said that, they are responsible for taking a sleazy, horrible, venal character and making them into moping idiots - consider Sonja Blue against one of the twerps from Twilight - she’d kill him as soon as look at him. </span><br />
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Be honest - despite being a seasoned horror pro, are you actually confident you can pronounce 'Cthulhu' correctly in public? <br />
<span style="color: #20124d;"><br />Not at all. I’ve always thought I was a bit of a social pariah, in that I have no real idea, so it’s nice to realise I’m not - thanks for the question. I always pronounce it as it’s written - Cuh-thoo-loo”, which is probably wrong. In fact, I’ve probably been involved in countless conversations at Cons where people have been discussing him and I just didn’t understand what they were talking about! </span><br />
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What's the most abominable thing you've done that you want to reveal to the internet at large? <br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">Well, I’ve never discussed this with anyone else at all but once I….. (nah, can’t tell you!) </span><br />
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The third issue of Penny Dreadnought is about the world ending. What's your favourite literary apocalypse? <br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">I have to be honest, I’m not a big fan of apocalyptic fiction as it plays on fears I’ve had since my teens (I watched Threads as a teenager, which wasn’t the smartest thing I ever did), but “The Stand” worked well for me. I enjoyed a lot of the Abaddon zombie series (such as Gary McMahon’s “Hungry Hearts”) and I’ve just critiqued an apocalyptic novel for Simon Bestwick, which is very, very good. </span><br />
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Aliens are threatening to destroy the human race unless we can prove we are civilised enough to live. However they are short of time, and out of the entire cultural repository of the world to date, they want a single short story of your to prove we are worth not vaporising. Which story do you pick and why? <br />
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<span style="color: #20124d;">I would probably go for <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Mill-a-novelette-ebook/dp/B005QBY84M/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1320886456&sr=8-1">“The Mill” </a>because, although it’s a ghost story, it’s really about grief and guilt and dealing with bereavement. I think it does have its scary moments - and it’s supposed to have - but it’s really about human emotions and how people deal with one another at those points in your life where you’re one step from the darkest abyss you’ve ever experienced. By showing the aliens that there is hope, even if it’s in the supernatural, hopefully they wouldn’t phase us!</span>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-58369001074810816612012-07-21T03:09:00.001-07:002012-09-05T12:11:02.269-07:00Honorary Abominable Gentlemen #2: Tony RabigAnother Friday night, another top quality horror author stumbles into the Jekyll and Hyde saloon... When asked "<span style="background-color: white;">What are you drinking?" by the Man With A Skull For A Head, <a href="http://tonyrabig.blogspot.co.uk/2012/06/ray.html">Tony Rabig</a> enters pub legend by being the first person to reply:</span><br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">Twinings Earl Grey tea. Soon, very soon, I'll grab a bottle of Heineken from the fridge. </span> <br />
Introduce yourself - as writers, we often get asked for boring factual author bios. If you could write an author bio unconstrained by the boundaries of reality and truth, what would it say? <br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">Hmmm. I tend a bit toward self-deprecation, so... How's this: </span></div>
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<span style="color: #444444;">Tony Rabig knew from an early age that he wanted to write, and resolved to learn from the best. He traveled back and forth across the United States, England, Europe, and South America in a decades-long quest to learn his craft from some of the world's finest writers. As a result of his efforts, numerous writers' organizations were formed and the organizations pooled their resources to hire the sharpest legal minds so that restraining orders might be filed against Rabig on behalf of their clients. Undaunted by the threat of lawsuits and prison, Rabig changed his tactics; no longer did he lie in wait for the writers, or sneak into their studios to go over their drafts -- now he followed the trash trucks to the landfills in hope of finding cast-off drafts or discarded file copies of manuscripts. When his few remaining friends complained about the stench, he gave up this practice, and simply began to write. The writers' organizations he had been instrumental in creating found other things to do. Rabig has recently been allowed to go off his medications, and begin using pens rather than crayons. He claims to no longer have any impulse to hold seances so that he might speak with Ernest Hemingway; his long-suffering wife, however, reports that he must occasionally be escorted out of libraries and bookstores because he tries to substitute his own name for Hemingway's on the contents pages of anthologies that include "The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber." Recently, he finished the very first draft of his very first declarative sentence, and he hopes to write another sentence soon. </span><br />
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If you had a Mister Hyde style alter-ego what would he/she be called and why? <br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">Godzilla. There are a number of places and people that really need the kind of attention Godzilla devotes to downtown Tokyo; the ability to morph into the big green guy would come in awfully handy there. If something more unobtrusive and not copyrighted or trademarked by Toho is needed for the alter-ego, though, let's go with Vinnie the Hammer. Same functions, basically, but on a much smaller and more personal scale. </span><br />
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'Literary horror' - oxymoron or your bread & butter as a writer? <br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">Certainly not an oxymoron. As for my bread & butter -- I can't say how "literary" my stuff is; I try to make sure it reads fairly smoothly and that it's not dull. </span><br />
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The Penny Dreadnought art features people-with-telescopes-for-eyes. What low-tech body adornment or extension would you like? <br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">Not really into that sort of thing myself, but a good pen for the right index finger might be of some use. </span><br />
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If you could make any one person - alive or dead, male or female, real or fictional - an honorary Abominable Gentleman, who would it be and why? <br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">I think I'd go with John Collier; for the reason, look no farther than his short story collection Fancies and Goodnights. Wonderful, wonderful stuff, and the book's worth the price of admission just for the closing paragraph of "Over Insurance." Trust me. </span><br />
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Let's bitch - we partially came up with the idea of Penny Dreadnought in reaction to a lot of the 'sparkly vampire' school of supernatural writing. What about writing or publishing today makes you want to scream? <br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">What's happened to mass market paperbacks over the last forty or fifty years. I groused about some of this in my blog a little while ago. When I started buying paperbacks, I could walk into a pharmacy in my neighborhood and find, in mass market editions, writers like Anthony Burgess, Vladimir Nabokov, John D. MacDonald, Anthony Powell, Theodore Sturgeon, Shirley Jackson, B. Traven, Cornell Woolrich, Henry James, Richard Matheson, John O'Hara, Isaac Bashevis Singer, W. Somerset Maugham, Nevil Shute, William Goldman, Evan Hunter, Roald Dahl, and more. A lot of the writers whose work once appeared in editions aimed at mass audiences simply aren't available that way any more, and the casual reader browsing the supermarket or WalMart racks won't see anything like that range of material. There's apparently an assumption that only the newest sparkly vampire stuff will sell enough copies to warrant that kind of distribution. Sad. </span><br />
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Be honest - despite being a seasoned horror pro, are you actually confident you can pronounce 'Cthulhu' correctly in public? <br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">Seasoned horror pro? Moi??? Anyway... Can I pronounce Cthulhu correctly in public? You bet. Ka-THOO-loo. Right? RIGHT????? </span><br />
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What's the most abominable thing you've done that you want to reveal to the internet at large? <br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">Well, in every national election from 1984 to date (and 2012 won't be any exception) I've voted a straight Republican ticket. Does that count?</span> <br />
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The third issue of Penny Dreadnought is about the world ending. What's your favourite literary apocalypse? <br />
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<span style="color: #444444;">Novel-length would be a three-way tie between Stephen King's The Stand, Richard Matheson's I Am Legend, and John Wyndham's The Day of the Triffids. Shorter -- a tie between Alfred Bester's "Adam and No Eve" and Arthur C. Clarke's "The Nine Billion Names of God," and I might toss "Vintage Season" by Henry Kuttner & C. L. Moore in there too. </span><br />
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Aliens are threatening to destroy the human race unless we can prove we are civilised enough to live. However they are short of time, and out of the entire cultural repository of the world to date, they want a single short story of yours to prove we are worth not vaporising. Which story do you pick and why?
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<span style="color: #444444;">One of my stories? Kiss the planet goodbye... While I don't necessarily think it's my best story, I'd probably</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444;"> go with "Acts of Faith" (included in "</span><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Other-Iron-River-Stories-ebook/dp/B0045JLQKA/ref=la_B0050VCF8E_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1342865224&sr=1-2" style="background-color: white;">The Other Iron River, and Other Stories."</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444;"> End of commercial.) The protagonist tries to preserve something of value for the future even though there's little hope he can do that, and even less hope for his own survival; but he tries anyway, putting his personal safety aside for larger concerns. Of course, aliens of a devious nature might regard people with that capacity as a potential threat and wipe us out just the same.</span></div>
James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-13407192715132893462012-07-13T13:08:00.002-07:002012-07-13T13:11:56.358-07:00Honorary Abominable Gentlemen #1: Cate Gardner<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiXMfohueRe3Hizcn1_HosV3WEmEcICUiaWiCYRuih08i6obE45HcDSCoubg1EwgaeHjKQJVUXrfNFAitlbdLOwQZ2Do8jRV3gjHE6WyXFIWcjZ-oGsGxGLETkeZCy4jAho405h-unkBab/s1600/MeSmaller.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiXMfohueRe3Hizcn1_HosV3WEmEcICUiaWiCYRuih08i6obE45HcDSCoubg1EwgaeHjKQJVUXrfNFAitlbdLOwQZ2Do8jRV3gjHE6WyXFIWcjZ-oGsGxGLETkeZCy4jAho405h-unkBab/s200/MeSmaller.jpg" width="150" /></a><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px;">The Abominable Gentlemen are always looking for exceptionally talented weird fiction authors, and luckily earlier this week the amazing<a href="http://www.categardner.net/"> Cate Gardner</a> wandered into the Jekyll & Hyde pub - either drawn there by mysterious, demonic forces or because she wanted to get out of the rain. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px;">Cate is the author of the short story collection <a href="http://www.categardner.net/p/strange-men.html" style="font-style: italic;">Strange Men in Pinstripe Suits</a> and if the title alone doesn't make you want to run out and buy it now, then you're dead to us.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px;">Naturally she was beckoned over for a chin-wag, and this was the result:</span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><i>What are you drinking?</i></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Maybe something non-alcoholic (and low calorie) or maybe a pint of rum and coke, heavy on the rum - it all depends on whether I'm Jekyll or Hyde. I hope I'm Hyde.</span></div>
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<i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Introduce yourself - as writers, we often get asked for boring<span class="ecxapple-converted-space"> </span></span></i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">factual<span class="ecxapple-converted-space"><i> </i></span><i>author bios. If you could write an author bio unconstrained by the boundaries of reality and truth, what would it say?</i></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">My name is Cate, which is short for</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"> </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Ca</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">therine the</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"> </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Te</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">rrible and I live in a hut at the bottom of the garden with a short hairy man called The Wolf Dude and a skeletal bloke known to regular folk as the Grim Reaper.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">My novellas have graced the hands of the famous (I dug up Charles Dickens and I've also dropped my books into the lap of Tim Burton - quite a feat when you consider I was flying over his garden in a hot air balloon). My short story collection is currently available on Pluto thanks to a gust of wind and an adventurous postman wearing a space suit he picked up in a fancy dress shop. Forthcoming stories will appear on all laptops and computers, possibly even some television screens, once the Gremlins in my employ have figured out how to hack the satellites. Watch this space.</span></div>
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<i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">If you had a Mister Hyde style alter-ego what would he/she be called and why?</span></i></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Oh my, I guess by this question you are assuming that I am Jekyll whereas I may actually be a Miss Hyde pretending to be a Miss Jekyll. In saying that I suppose I should temporarily shake off my disguise and reveal who I truly am…</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">I am Eugenie Primrose, a time-travelling double agent in the court of Victoria and my weapons of choice are an umbrella and poisoned lipstick.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Have you noticed how I've been three different people in the first three questions? I suspect I'm very confused.</span></div>
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<i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">'Literary horror' - oxymoron or your bread & butter as a writer?</span></i></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Neither. Of course horror can be literary, although I doubt I am (I'll leave that up to the reader to decide).</span></div>
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<i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">The Penny Dreadnought art features people-with-telescopes-for-eyes. What low-tech body adornment or extension would you like?</span></i></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Something to make me taller would be good. Then I could finish painting the little strip of wall above my bath. At the moment, I'm contemplating really high platform shoes or balancing on someone's shoulders.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcf5YqjdF9deA9Pgxoj-8S4YcywdRKf2ZG7w_xJGko0zXkJlnUpWQGddL22CmwRtLfUhBoQckd_fx7nc4frIDn40pUqxkbIKdVY4iNK1zWRqYTc-yhucEBIcNdApxwXLOdUhwGkp_2Yz_M/s320/strangemencoverartsmall.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcf5YqjdF9deA9Pgxoj-8S4YcywdRKf2ZG7w_xJGko0zXkJlnUpWQGddL22CmwRtLfUhBoQckd_fx7nc4frIDn40pUqxkbIKdVY4iNK1zWRqYTc-yhucEBIcNdApxwXLOdUhwGkp_2Yz_M/s320/strangemencoverartsmall.jpg" width="206" /></a><i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">If you could make any one person - alive or dead, male or female, real or fictional - an honorary Abominable Gentleman, who would it be and why? </span></i></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Oscar Wilde for his wit, his dress sense and his fabulous hair.</span></div>
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<i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Let's bitch - we partially came up with the idea of Penny Dreadnought in reaction to a lot of the 'sparkly vampire' school of supernatural writing. What about writing or publishing today makes<span class="ecxapple-converted-space"> </span></span></i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">you<span class="ecxapple-converted-space"> </span><i>want to scream?</i></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">I don't think anything makes me want to scream but that's a rather boring reply. Ooh, I do have something. I want to scream every time someone at work asks have I read Fifty Shades of Grey and then goes on to tell me how bloody brilliant it is and I should read it. And I doubly hate that they'll then re-read that book a dozen times rather than giving another author a go.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">I'm a little mad now.</span></div>
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<i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Be honest - despite being a seasoned horror pro, are you actually confident you can pronounce 'Cthulhu' correctly in public?</span></i></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Until I heard the word spoken in an episode of Supernatural (season 6, I think), I was saying it completely wrong. And no, I'm not confident I could pronounce it correctly, but I'll admit I also don't really care about Cthulhu. I'm not a Lovecraft fan. (Should I get my coat now?)</span></div>
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<i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">What's the most abominable thing you've done that you want to reveal to the internet at large?</span></i></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Now if I don't answer this question you're going to think I have something to hide. Thus, I shan't answer the question.</span></div>
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<i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">The third issue of Penny Dreadnought is about the world ending. What's your favourite literary apocalypse?</span></i></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">I want to say 'I am Legend' by Richard Matheson, but that would be cheating because I've only watched the movies. I know! I loved 'The </span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Forest</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"> of Hands and Teeth' by Carrie Ryan, but was less keen on the sequels so feel I shouldn't pick that. So I'll plump for 'The Road' by Cormac McCarthy.</span></div>
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<i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Aliens are threatening to destroy the human race unless we can prove we are civilised enough to live. However they are short of time, and out of the entire cultural repository of the world to date, they want a<span class="ecxapple-converted-space"> </span></span></i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">single short story<span class="ecxapple-converted-space"> </span><i>of your to prove we are worth not vaporising. Which story do you pick and why?</i></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">We're fucked.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">I guess I should pick</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"> </span><i style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Empty Box Motel </i><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">because it’s a sad little tale and the aliens will be too busy wiping their eyes and blowing their noses to kill us all. They may still vaporise me though.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 21px;">Buy <a href="http://www.categardner.net/">Cate Gardner's</a> books! And don't forget the first <i>Penny Dreadnought Omnibus </i>is out now (</span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Penny-Dreadnought-Omnibus-Volume-ebook/dp/B008HLQKXA" style="background-color: white; text-decoration: none;">Amazon</a>| <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Penny-Dreadnought-Omnibus-Volume-ebook/dp/B008HLQKXA" style="text-decoration: none;">Amazon UK</a>|</span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/penny-dreadnought-alan-ryker/1111961336" style="background-color: white; text-decoration: none;">Barnes & Noble</a>)</span></span>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-15533837294446058992012-07-08T13:19:00.000-07:002012-07-08T13:19:13.707-07:00The Penny Dreadnought Files...Want to hear how the Abominable Gentlemen and Penny Dreadnought are viewed by the powers that be? You betcha. Then head on over to Keith Brooke's site and <a href="http://keithbrooke.wordpress.com/2012/07/08/the-penny-dreadnought-files-transcript-of-the-debriefing-of-agent-742c-a-guest-post-by-mr-everington/#respond">read this</a>.<br />
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<span style="color: #555555; font-family: Verdana, 'BitStream vera Sans', Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px;"><i>"I don’t mind admitting to feeling some nausea."</i></span></blockquote>
<span style="background-color: white;">Keith runs the excellent <a href="http://www.infinityplus.co.uk/books/">Infinity Plus </a>small press; plus with this act of kindness he's ensured himself a place in at least the middle-echelons of the Abominable Government, when our plans come to fruition... In the meantime, check out his books!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">And don't forget the first <i>Penny Dreadnought Omnibus </i>is out now (</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; text-decoration: none;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Penny-Dreadnought-Omnibus-Volume-ebook/dp/B008HLQKXA" style="background-color: white; text-decoration: none;">Amazon</a>| <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Penny-Dreadnought-Omnibus-Volume-ebook/dp/B008HLQKXA">Amazon UK</a> |</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; text-decoration: none;"><a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/penny-dreadnought-alan-ryker/1111961336" style="background-color: white; text-decoration: none;">Barnes & Noble</a>)</span></div>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-27907985287001930052012-07-07T03:40:00.003-07:002012-07-07T03:40:43.436-07:00Penny Dreadnought Omnibus - Volume 1<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmw56uzDtA4HttrBzhN3aKd8eL2VOooziDLUCjNEWsrKJy3ZvGwPyb_PwIFsGwxa6Hh_v-5-JRW0v402_mX6WIwxspWnsIr1Z9paAVh1MgVpI9HyAeJ30IJ-SNrH6L3X65lG9DMeFl7kA/s1600/PDOMNIBUS01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; color: #33aaff; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmw56uzDtA4HttrBzhN3aKd8eL2VOooziDLUCjNEWsrKJy3ZvGwPyb_PwIFsGwxa6Hh_v-5-JRW0v402_mX6WIwxspWnsIr1Z9paAVh1MgVpI9HyAeJ30IJ-SNrH6L3X65lG9DMeFl7kA/s320/PDOMNIBUS01.jpg" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0976563) 1px 1px 5px; border: 1px solid transparent; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0976563) 1px 1px 5px; padding: 5px; position: relative;" /></a></div>
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">The Abominable Gentlemen's diabolical plan is coming to fruition, with the release of the first Penny Dreadnought Omnibus!</span><br style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;" /><br style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;" /><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">It contains all sixteen stories from the first four volumes of Penny Dreadnought as well as a bonus gallery of cover art. Side effects may vary from reader to reader, but are likely to include: trembling hands; creeping dread; visions of the end times; speaking in tongues; existential doubt, and an intolerance to sparkly vampires.</span><div style="color: #2a2a2a; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px;">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Experience it at <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Penny-Dreadnought-Omnibus-Volume-ebook/dp/B008HLQKXA/ref=sr_1_10?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1341510493&sr=1-10" style="color: #cc0000; text-decoration: none;">Amazon UK</a> | <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Penny-Dreadnought-Omnibus-Volume-ebook/dp/B008HLQKXA/ref=sr_1_12?ie=UTF8&qid=1341510510&sr=8-12&keywords=james+everington" style="color: #cc0000; text-decoration: none;">Amazon US</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: normal;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">The stories are:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Lilies’ - Iain Rowan</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Cargo’ - Aaron Polson</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘First Time Buyers’ - James Everington</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Invasion of the Shark-Men’ - Alan Ryker</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Falling Over’ by James Everington</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘All the Pretty Yellow Flowers’ by Aaron Polson</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Ice Age’ by Iain Rowan</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘A Face to Meet the Faces that You Meet’ by Alan Ryker</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Precious Metal’ by Aaron Polson</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Only the Lonely’ by Iain Rowan</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘The New Words’ by Alan Ryker</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘He’ by James Everington</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Occupational Hazard’ by Iain Rowan</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘The Aerialist’ by Alan Ryker</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Packob's Reward’ by James Everington</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">‘Poe's Blender’ by Aaron Polson</span></div>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-52577585673847113162012-07-02T09:14:00.000-07:002012-07-02T09:14:10.543-07:00Coming Soon: Four Times the Abomination<img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW2Py4RDDm3auUIHM3EbJeWHPkyQts0WUTj72KCsGmLRsqK3-YRQMjjZ_Ztn6rHThfB6IjSt6TjnU2mgF1vlPOy1FcTVF6PGz2vIpFpBSKFZwC-Kn-KqjC7AKBd0sCSEP7IQ7NhONXUE0/s640/PDO01.jpg" />James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-66065770862249256332012-06-12T09:39:00.001-07:002012-06-12T09:39:25.917-07:00Gentlemen AloudA short story by one of the Abominable Gentlemen, Iain Rowan, is available to listen to as an audio file over at Supernatural Tales.<br />
<br />
The Gentlemen advise you to listen to it <a href="http://suptales.blogspot.co.uk/2012/06/edge-of-map-by-iain-rowan_12.html">here</a> posthaste, to avoid any needless unpleasantness.James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-30383225143569706152012-04-20T09:48:00.003-07:002012-04-20T09:48:45.704-07:00Uncommitted Crimes...<br />
The Abominable Gentlemen have been busy in the lab again, and after much boiling of test-tubes and loss of eyebrows, I am pleased to say that fourth volumes of <a href="http://www.pennydreadnought.com/">Penny Dreadnought</a> is available now.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxwBqrfwl4XBo03czN8b61ppFqDB0yY07jxDkAJ9WbP2Dftf160ERK8f9uJ0z_3X1Mqaw0KFfu_xURgRyIBiPzK7dpbtCXxRSd_RXStj77gqTaXd3yMiPqP0UCgKq8yU6x4YrJBazJE6E/s1600/PD04cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxwBqrfwl4XBo03czN8b61ppFqDB0yY07jxDkAJ9WbP2Dftf160ERK8f9uJ0z_3X1Mqaw0KFfu_xURgRyIBiPzK7dpbtCXxRSd_RXStj77gqTaXd3yMiPqP0UCgKq8yU6x4YrJBazJE6E/s320/PD04cover.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
This issue's honorary Gentlemen is Theodor W. Adorno, whose quote <i>“Behind every work of art lies an uncommitted crime”</i> was the inspiration for the title. That was my idea; I'm the Abominable Gentlemen who brings unnecessary pretentiousness to the group.<br />
<br />
The issue contains four tales of murder, malfeasance and malarky:<br />
<br />
<i>Occupational Hazard</i> by Iain Rowan<br />
<i>The Aerialist</i> by Alan Ryker<br />
<i>Packob's Reward</i> by James Everington<br />
<i>Poe's Blender</i> by Aaron Polson<br />
<br />
Commit your own crime by downloading it from Amazon (<a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Penny-Dreadnought-Uncommitted-Crimes-ebook/dp/B007VUYHBK/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1334939879&sr=8-4">UK</a> | <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Penny-Dreadnought-Uncommitted-Crimes-ebook/dp/B007VUYHBK/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1334939879&sr=8-4">US</a>), Barnes & Noble, or <a href="https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/153379">Smashwords</a>.<br />
<br class="Apple-interchange-newline" />James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-55560197548046626762012-03-01T12:03:00.000-08:002012-03-01T12:03:18.664-08:00Waifs And Strays<span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">As Alan mentioned in his introduction to <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Penny-Dreadnought-Level-Sands-ebook/dp/B00797OXMS">Penny Dreadnought: The Lone And Level Sands</a>, we get all kinds of waifs and strays wandering into the Jekyll and Hyde pub. The Abominable Gentlemen normally end up subbing them a pint or two (they don't always have the right currency in their pockets, depending on where/when they've come from), dusting them down, and sending them on their way. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Some of them, like </span><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Percy Shelley, are cocks (see last post for why). But others we consider honorary Abominable Gentlemen (of either gender). There are a few of them who stick out in my memory:</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><b style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Bill Heine</b><span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> - the man behind the </span><a href="http://www.headington.org.uk/shark/" style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><b><span style="color: #990000;">Headington Shark</span></b></a><span style="background-color: white; color: #660000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> </span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><b style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Johnson"><span style="color: #990000;">Robert Leroy Johnson</span></a></b><span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> - he didn't sell his soul to the Devil, he just stopped by for a Hooch</span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><b style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sylvia_Plath"><span style="color: #990000;">Sylvia Plath</span></a><span style="color: #666666;"> - </span></b><span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">great poet and karaoke singer </span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><b style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Al-Khwairzmi</b><span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> - this man invented the </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">decimal point. </i><span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">But he's shit at bar-billiards.</span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><b style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Billy Casper </b><span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">- the boy from </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kes_(film)" style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><b><span style="color: #990000;">Kes</span></b></a><span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">. Not technically old enough to drink, but we tend to turn a blind eye.</span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><b style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">June Hautot</b><span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> - great usage of the word "codswallop" </span><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkDunmqoRYM" style="background-color: white; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><b><span style="color: #990000;">here</span></b></a></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><b style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;">Edwin Abbott Abbott - </b><span style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;">an excellent name, and author of a</span><b style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;"> <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flatland"><span style="color: #990000;">book about life in two-dimensions</span></a></b><span style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;">. He'd had a few that night, to be fair.</span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alice_Through_the_Looking_Glass" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #990000;"><b>Alice</b> </span></a><span style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;">- obviously.</span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><b style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;">Hans Holbein The Younger</b><span style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;"> - painted </span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Ambassadors_(Holbein)"><b><span style="color: #990000;">The Ambassadors</span></b></a><span style="color: #666666;">, </span></i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;">realistic portrait apart from the</span><i style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;"> massive distorted skull </i><span style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;">in the foreground (The Abominable Gentlemen like pictures with massive distorted skulls in)</span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="color: #666666;">The Pilot, Cabin Crew And Passengers of Douglas DC-3 airliner</span><span style="color: #990000;"> <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NC16002_disappearance"><span style="color: #990000;">NC16002</span></a></span></b></span><span style="color: #666666; font-family: sans-serif; line-height: 19px;"> - they still haven't <i>left</i> the pub yet, actually.</span></li>
</ul>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-26411289131701777002012-02-22T13:45:00.000-08:002012-02-22T13:45:55.086-08:00Lone and Level Sands Foreword<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Percy Shelley was kind of a dick.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As you’re aware by now, the Jekyll and Hyde Pub is
frequented by a number of tortured geniuses. About a month back, Percy Shelley
is stumbling around the place, trying to bum pints. Turns out Daddy, Sir
Thomas, had cut off his allowance. Though that’s certainly not the most moving
sob story, we throw him a bone. We tell him about the (post-)apocalyptic issue
of Penny Dreadnought we’re about to publish, and that he can contribute a poem.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
After reading our stories, he whips up “Ozymandias” right
there. We‘re like, “Okay, that’s pretty good,” and he drinks on us for the rest of the evening.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He stumbles out of the pub and back into his own time, and
publishes the poem 200 years ago, selling first rights twice and leaving us no
recourse but to take our revenge on his cremated remains (the details of which
can’t be described in polite company).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Anyway, we paid for it, and we’re going to use it.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>OZYMANDIAS of EGYPT</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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I met a traveller from an antique land</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Who said:—Two vast and trunkless legs of stone</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Stand in the desert. Near them on the sand,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Half sunk, a shatter'd visage lies, whose frown</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And wrinkled lip and sneer of cold command</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Which yet survive, stamp'd on these lifeless things,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The hand that mock'd them and the heart that fed.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And on the pedestal these words appear:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!"</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nothing beside remains: round the decay</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,</div>
<span style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The lone and level sands stretch far away.</span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02264075796596433731noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-67788523595220100062012-02-16T15:12:00.001-08:002012-02-16T15:12:49.261-08:00The Lone and Level Sands<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpSMx1zN40lwgY6r-ysNOd96_l1KyzQP5FinaavPku0XbL_d0Nte2lKVEaVfZMOzURVuSppKafcUxWpZWg2Zga5NXeDKx-eP2R1xhpuTMVQu8nEChfi9qKLtQ-SRwu41jyKWDFMHO1zUg/s1600/PD03cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpSMx1zN40lwgY6r-ysNOd96_l1KyzQP5FinaavPku0XbL_d0Nte2lKVEaVfZMOzURVuSppKafcUxWpZWg2Zga5NXeDKx-eP2R1xhpuTMVQu8nEChfi9qKLtQ-SRwu41jyKWDFMHO1zUg/s320/PD03cover.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">The Abominable Gentlemen build four worlds only to destroy them in this apocalypse-themed issue of <i>Penny Dreadnought</i>. Witness four unique visions of the end in:</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">“Precious Metal” by Aaron Polson</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">“Only the Lonely” by Iain Rowan</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">“The New Words” by Alan Ryker</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">“He” by James Everington</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><i>Penny Dreadnought: The Lone and Level Sands</i> is 20,000 words, or approximately 80 pages. Buy it at:</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Penny-Dreadnought-Level-Sands-ebook/dp/B00797OXMS">Amazon</a> / <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Penny-Dreadnought-Level-Sands-ebook/dp/B00797OXMS">UK</a></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/penny-dreadnought-iain-rowan/1108826821">Barnes & Noble</a></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/132759">Smashwords</a></span><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02264075796596433731noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-44019061798134298782012-02-01T11:31:00.000-08:002012-02-01T11:42:03.355-08:00The Man With A Skull For A Head Interviews #4: James Everington<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1FTxFSVxkHYpe5_tlx45wYuash2QY7DFyUNa_Ep4DTQIBfn_37GpSEIc5CLWnMX930DcmDV-qxHQGdZtpRD1LT7ATLlNwBDHEydP3_IvXkZasTd8mQOAm_Oc08R_fmMNuqdFneHReluMg/s1600/thegentlemenarrow.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="211" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1FTxFSVxkHYpe5_tlx45wYuash2QY7DFyUNa_Ep4DTQIBfn_37GpSEIc5CLWnMX930DcmDV-qxHQGdZtpRD1LT7ATLlNwBDHEydP3_IvXkZasTd8mQOAm_Oc08R_fmMNuqdFneHReluMg/s320/thegentlemenarrow.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The last interview of the night was conduced by The Man With A Skull For A Head in an almost deserted back-room of the Jekyll and Hyde (a pub which has stuck to the fine tradition of the 'lock in' despite the change to licensing laws making it obsolete everywhere else).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The final victim was <a href="http://www.jameseverington.blogspot.com/">James Everington</a>. Some regulars in the Jekyll and Hyde say the The Man With A Skull For A Head can't actually talk at all (lacking vocal chords as he does) and that Everington was in fact just asking questions of himself in a silly, put on voice. The Abominable Gentleman of course vigorously denies such a charge.</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>TMWASFAH: </b>"</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>If you could make any one person - alive or dead, male or female, real or fictional - an honorary Abominable Gentleman, who would it be and why?"</i></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>JE:</b> As a Nottingham lad I'll have to say Robin Hood - I love the fact that the local government flies flags all over the place to someone who was basically a socialist terrorist. I think the Occupy movement has really missed a trick adopting <i>V For Vendetta</i> as their unofficial mask of choice (great though V is). I mean here was a guy whose motto was "rob the rich to help the poor.... and fill the tax-dodging bastards with arrows if they refuse." </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I guess there are unpleasant associations with Kevin Costner and leggings, though.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>TMWASFAH: </b><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>What's the most abominable thing you've done that you want to reveal to the internet at large?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>JE:</b> I once tripped up<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Timmy_Mallet"> Timmy Mallet</a> at a train-station. He almost fell onto the tracks right in front of a oncoming train arriving at the platform. It was probably the closest to death he's ever been. This was in his post-Wacaday career lull. (Non-UK readers may have no idea who Timmy Mallet is -<i> for the sake of your sanity don't search for clips of him on You Tube.)</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Serendipitously I've just noticed from his Wikipedia page that Mr. Mallet went to school in <i>Hyde</i>. How "utterly brilliant!"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>TMWASFAH: </b><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>As you know, the Gentlemen drink in the Jekyll and Hyde pub. If you had a Mister Hyde style alter-ego what would he (she?!) be called and why?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>JE:</b> Alan Ryker.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>TMWASFAH: </b><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>If you had a free pick from all of literature of one story by a guest author for a future issue of Penny Dreadnought, what would it be?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>JE:</b> <a href="http://ireadashortstorytoday.com/2005/10/richard-brautigan-scarlatti-tilt.html"><i>The Scarlatti Tilt</i> </a>by Richard Brautigan. A title and two sentences, and a better story than most of us will ever achieve in this life time.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As writers, we often get asked for boring factual author bios. If you could write an author bio unconstrained by the boundaries of reality and truth, what would it say?"</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></i><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>JE:</b> James Everington, author of The Scarlatti Tilt and other stories, robbed those tax-dodging bastards at arrow-point, gave the money to the poor, got the girl, tripped Timmy Mallet over at a railway station near Hyde, and <i>still </i>managed to get to the pub in time for Iain Rowan's round.</span><br />
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"What one thing would you like to know about the other Abominable Gentlemen that you currently don't?"</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>JE:</b> What are you drinking?</span><br />
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"What one book of yours would you like to plug to the Penny Dreadnought readership?"</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>JE:</b> <i>The Other Room</i> is a collection of my 'weird fiction', although it does not contain <i>The Scarlatti Tilt.</i> If you buy it and are rich I promise to give the proceeds to the poor without perpetrating any arrow-related crime on you.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Timmy Mallet, if you are reading this, I probably owe you a free copy. Get in touch.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Buy <i>The Other Room</i> at Amazon: </span><a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Other-Room-ebook/dp/B004Z1CUN0/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1327521147&sr=8-1" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">US</a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> | </span><a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Other-Room-ebook/dp/B004Z1CUN0/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1327521147&sr=8-1" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK</a>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-39700999518939979032012-01-28T03:36:00.000-08:002012-01-28T03:36:58.470-08:00Beware the flowers that walk<br />
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It all sounds innocent enough.</div>
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Four authors, with a broad but shared vision of good weird and chilling fiction, banding together to release a series of books.</div>
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Innocent enough. Except when those authors happen to be the Abominable Gentlemen. Oh, each volume is on its own ordinary enough. Four fine stories, one from each of the Gentlemen, maybe a guest author, all usually based around a theme. Nothing exceptional. Nothing untowards. </div>
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Just words.</div>
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But of course, being Abominable, the Gentlemen have a wider plan. Hatched late one night, over brandies in the club. In the corner, the Man With A Skull For A Head nodded his quiet encouragement.</div>
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Although each volume on its own is harmless, a pleasing diversion or a brief hair-raising chill, piece by piece they form part of a greater whole. A greater whole that, when complete, will change everything. Once the work is complete the words in the individual volumes will seek each other out, as if drawn by some strange attractor, and the words will fuse and the words will twist, and they will feed and they will change and they will <i>breed</i>. An alchemical transformation of language will take place that will spell out the secret words of the universe itself, the words of power that hold the bonds of reality together and which will open the gate to universes beyond all human imagining. A million beautiful but terrible mutant flowers will bloom, reaching their twisted petals in supplication to skies of molten cloud, before they wrench their roots shuddering from the earth, and start to <i>walk</i>.</div>
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At least, that's the plan. The original arcane rituals demanded volumes of illuminated lettering on parchments made from the shirts of martyrs, and we are not yet sure whether it will survive the conversion to Amazon's proprietary electronic format. </div>
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But are you sure that it won't?</div>Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-80003700296417294952012-01-26T18:00:00.000-08:002012-01-26T18:00:01.353-08:00The Man With A Skull For A Head Interviews #3: Aaron Polson<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMsitGsk8PPqV-kIHjSM4R-ZwG3q07a_mlyeZpEcp6rEWCxm0FbLMFj0VKgmCjxkd_uIJQhtdncwWuOfROV3Q6sSvGULboA9aXzB538HFzWyTtqfTeBxzs5pV62mrJB5tkV18TOPMoTlAn/s1600/thegentlemenarrow.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="211" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMsitGsk8PPqV-kIHjSM4R-ZwG3q07a_mlyeZpEcp6rEWCxm0FbLMFj0VKgmCjxkd_uIJQhtdncwWuOfROV3Q6sSvGULboA9aXzB538HFzWyTtqfTeBxzs5pV62mrJB5tkV18TOPMoTlAn/s320/thegentlemenarrow.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Later that same evening, The Man The Man With A Skull For A Head interviewed <a href="http://www.aaronpolson.net/">Aaron Polson</a> - it was getting close to chucking out time at the Jeykll and Hyde, but obviously the Abominable Gentlemen are in cahoots with the barman, and an old-fashioned 'lock in' is theirs upon request...so there's never any need for them to stop drinking Blue Monkey if they don't wish to.<br />
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This may explain a lot.<br />
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<br /><b style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">TMWASFAH:</b> <i>"If you could make any one person - alive or dead, male or female, real or fictional - an honorary Abominable Gentleman, who would it be and why?"</i><br /><br /><b>AP:</b> Without going the obvious "H.P. Lovecraft" / "Edgar Allan Poe" route, I'm going to say Charles Darwin. While not a fiction writer, that dude was really thinking out of the box.<br /> <br /><br /><b style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">TMWASFAH:</b> <i>"What's the most abominable thing you've done that you want to reveal to the internet at large?"</i><br /><br />I'm ashamed of this one--and it amounts to theft as well as "murder"--I pulled fish from a tank at a discount store when I was five or six. I liked the way they felt in my hand: squish and wet. When I heard footsteps, I dropped the poor little guy (a goldfish, I think), and it suffocated on the white tile floor. <br /> <br /><br /><b style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">TMWASFAH:</b> <i>"As you know, the Gentlemen drink in the Jekyll and Hyde pub. If you had a Mister Hyde style alter-ego what would he (she?!) be called and why?"</i><br /><br />If I had an alter-ego? I thought I was the alter ego... My alter-ego would probably have a nice, safe name like "Bob Jones" or something. Either that or Pleather Tuxedo (after the fictional girl band "Leather Tuscadero and the Suedes" from TV's Happy Days.<br /><br /><br /><b style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">TMWASFAH:</b> <i>"If you had a free pick from all of literature of one story by a guest author for a future issue of Penny Dreadnought, what would it be?"</i><br /><br />"Greasy Lake" by T. Coraghessan Boyle would be my first pick. Man I love that story--great voice, great imagery, and a mossy, waterlogged corpse. It speaks to my growing up in middle America, too. H.P. Lovecraft's "The Rats in the Walls" comes in a close second. The "big reveal" in "Rats" still gives me chills, and I've read it ten+ times.<br /> <br /><br /><b style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">TMWASFAH:</b> <i>"As writers, we often get asked for boring factual author bios. If you could write an author bio unconstrained by the boundaries of reality and truth, what would it say?"</i><br /><br />I'd say that I'm made of marshmallow fluff and branches from a willow tree with an I.Q. of 134. I could go higher on the I.Q., but why get cocky?<br /> <br /><b style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">TMWASFAH:</b> <i>"What one thing would you like to know about one of the other Abominable Gentlemen that you currently don't?"</i><br /><br />Peanut butter: do you believe it's more peanut or more butter? <br /> <br /><b style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">TMWASFAH:</b> <i>"What one book of yours would you like to plug to the Penny Dreadnought </i>
<i>readership?"</i><br /><br />I'd love for more folks to read <i>Loathsome, Dark and Deep </i>(Amazon <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Loathsome-Dark-and-Deep-ebook/dp/B004GEAMNG/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1322500076&sr=8-1">US</a> | <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Loathsome-Dark-and-Deep-ebook/dp/B004GEAMNG/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1322500076&sr=8-1">UK</a>). I loved writing that book and it's garnered some decent reviews. I think it would make a nice film, too. (wink, wink)<div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMMVtBFEgW_lNzmJ0Mwrcw7WJwgfr4pZsEnzOGZ7iX-EVUD0Ax7HJt-Xqghw2AHnigRoXLIEWiG1GsRoWR3yeSwhYAthKm36Fb94Zxrwca0o5KLrYMd-L9WgQ1FwrwKseOw4eneW5iNfFw/s1600/loathsome+dark+and+deep+cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMMVtBFEgW_lNzmJ0Mwrcw7WJwgfr4pZsEnzOGZ7iX-EVUD0Ax7HJt-Xqghw2AHnigRoXLIEWiG1GsRoWR3yeSwhYAthKm36Fb94Zxrwca0o5KLrYMd-L9WgQ1FwrwKseOw4eneW5iNfFw/s200/loathsome+dark+and+deep+cover.jpg" width="130" /></a><br /><br /><br /></div>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-73238294690019201802012-01-22T07:03:00.000-08:002012-01-22T07:46:00.230-08:00The Man With A Skull For A Head Interviews #2: Alan Ryker<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Alan Ryker, Yesterday</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Man With A Skull For A Head interviews continue, with the second victim being the Abominable Gentlemen's criminal mastermind, </span><a href="http://www.alanryker.com/" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Alan Ryker</b>.</a><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Again, the interview as conducted over a few pints in the<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 18px;">Jeykll and Hyde pub, which is located in Nottingham, Sunderland or Kansas, depending on your (and its) point of view. Regardless of location, its measures are always in Imperial.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><b>TMWASFAH: </b><i>"If you could make any one person - alive or
dead, male or female, real or fictional - an honorary Abominable
Gentleman, who would it be and why?"</i></span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>AR:</b> Abolitionist John Brown. He’s my personal hero, but an actual
hero only because he ended up on the right side of history. He makes liberals
very nervous because he was essentially a terrorist for the correct side,
murdering and pillaging against slavery. I hold few memberships, as I am picky
about my associates. One is as an Abominable Gentlemen. The other, a soldier in
John Brown’s army.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<b style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><i>What's the most abominable thing you've
done that you want to reveal to the internet at large?"</i></span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I developed a breed of dog which is so cute that it destroys the
minds of all those who look upon it: the pughuameranian. Once you see a
pughuameranian, your existence is hollow until you have one to call your very
own. But of course, there’s only one! Madness, thy name is Chewie!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So many ruined lives…<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<b style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><i>As you know, the Gentlemen drink in
the Jekyll and Hyde pub. If you had a Mister Hyde style alter-ego
what would he (she?!) be called and why?"</i></span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I revealed my alter-ego with a palindrome in my author’s notes
in <i>Penny Dreadnought: Descartes’ Demon</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Alan Ryker is evil. Live, Sire Kyrnala!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Although I’m not certain if it’s a Jekyll and Hyde situation, as
Sire Kyrnala is also quite evil. The main difference between us is that he hates
cilantro, while I love it.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<b style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;">If you had a free pick from all of
literature of</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"> </span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;">one</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"> </span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;">story by a guest author for a future issue of
Penny Dreadnought, what would it be?"</span></i><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’ve never read better portrayals of the beautiful connection
between genius and self-destruction as in the works of Jim Shephard. My
favorite example of this is probably “Climb Aboard the Mighty Flea.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<b style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222; font-style: italic;">As writers, we often get asked for boring</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222; font-style: italic;"> </span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;">factual</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"> <i>author bios. If you could write an
author bio unconstrained by the boundaries of reality and truth, what
would it say?"</i></span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Alan Ryker is Evil. Live, Sire Kyrnala!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Though that is both factual and truthful, it’s what I’d say if
unconstrained.<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222; font-style: italic;">What one thing would you like to know about
one of the</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222; font-style: italic;"> </span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;">other</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"> </span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222; font-style: italic;">Abominable Gentlemen that you currently don't?"</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why would you ever choose to associate with Alan Ryker?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oh, how self-absorbed of me! Isn’t that abominable? No? Just
kind of dickish? Well, that’s a step in the right direction, wouldn’t you say?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Okay, then I would ask Mr. Everington how he manages to commit
so many abominable deeds. I have a feeling he has some sort of
time-manipulation device, and I’d like to borrow it.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe then I could manage to fit a little rest for the wicked
into my busy schedule.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></o:p></span></b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdAItvoUouWCQgEEjgCeSXLzAIcVt03nIdOlApGv37a903kBpJMTFIUh8vh1RrWypHKLcYT6oqXDZyvi-lktiaDXfeNoamFpEJIWQI992EAdB2SgP05c6KTkPU6OvblHw9fQxn-QzdsxYC/s1600/psychomancer.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdAItvoUouWCQgEEjgCeSXLzAIcVt03nIdOlApGv37a903kBpJMTFIUh8vh1RrWypHKLcYT6oqXDZyvi-lktiaDXfeNoamFpEJIWQI992EAdB2SgP05c6KTkPU6OvblHw9fQxn-QzdsxYC/s320/psychomancer.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<b style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"</i></span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>What one book of yours would you like to
plug to the Penny Dreadnought readership?"</i><b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I want someone to buy <i>Psychomancer</i>, just for the novelty of
it. It’s full of humor, pseudo-philosophic ramblings and great heaping helpings
of my trademark, over-the-top violence! But no one ever buys it. I have no idea
why not. Does it have halitosis?</span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 0cm;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>Answer the halitosis question for yourself by buying </i>Psychomancer from Amazon (<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Psychomancer-ebook/dp/B0056ADQXC/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1327244546&sr=8-1">US</a> | <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Psychomancer-ebook/dp/B0056ADQXC/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1327244546&sr=8-1">UK</a>)</span></div>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-75084953147323022932012-01-18T11:02:00.000-08:002012-01-18T11:02:51.195-08:00The Man With A Skull For A Head Interviews #1: Iain Rowan<div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEif8b5ohFIxCx11cSmnKj2rtEX-EnELfy0h613q5D442eZX_RApaiZrhTTLkjqQFXzTtcc8NlZ2P1s2EYq4k5PY2sgJC0qjAtOTRCIHdt9BnAFGQ2hF-ITA2w8omSPeHaQTEmwFzHeKhsxz/s1600/thegentlemenarrow.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="209" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEif8b5ohFIxCx11cSmnKj2rtEX-EnELfy0h613q5D442eZX_RApaiZrhTTLkjqQFXzTtcc8NlZ2P1s2EYq4k5PY2sgJC0qjAtOTRCIHdt9BnAFGQ2hF-ITA2w8omSPeHaQTEmwFzHeKhsxz/s320/thegentlemenarrow.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><i>Iain Rowan, Yesterday</i></span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Man With A Skull For A Head recently interviewed each of the Abominable Gentlemen in their usual haunt of the Jeykll and Hyde pub. History does not record how many pints of Blue Monkey either participant had drunk by this p</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">oint, but you can judge for yourself from the transcript below.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">First victim, <a href="http://blog.iainrowan.com/"><b>Iain Rowan</b></a>:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>TMWASFAH: </b>"</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>If you could make any one person - alive or dead, male or female, real or fictional - an honorary Abominable Gentleman, who would it be and why?"</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>IR:</b> I'm not sure if he was real, or fictional, or a combination of the two, but I think I would like our company to be joined by Merlin. He'd be great fun to have around for lots of reasons:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Merlin, the Gentlemen are out of tea/stout/crumpets, would you mind just waving your staff and..."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Merlin, our Amazon Sales Rank is slipping. Would you mind just waving your staff and..."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Merlin, can I have a go of your pointy hat?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Merlin, you have amazing powers, the like of which have not been seen on earth before or since. So, you know. The whole Mordred and Arthur thing. The greatest king the country has ever known. Slain in battle. Busy that day were you, Merlin, washing your beard? Merlin? Come on, I'm only kidding, you know that. Don't frown so. I am abominable after all. We'll go out after lunch and play swords in stones if it will make you smile again."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>TMWASFAH: </b><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>What's the most abominable thing you've done that you want to reveal to the internet at large?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>IR:</b> When I was a child, I once pulled the wings off a fairy. Horrible, but I knew no better.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It gets worse though. I felt very guilty about this, so I put the fairy into a shoebox with every intention of asking my mum to sew the wings back on, but then a friend came round asking if I'd go out and play football, and I got muddy and had to have a bath when I came back in, and then there were cartoons on the TV, and then it was time for bed and then...it was two months before I looked in the shoebox.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I gen</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">erally avoid mounds, tumuli and rings now.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>TMWASFAH: </b><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>As you know, the Gentlemen drink in the Jekyll and Hyde pub. If you had a Mister Hyde style alter-ego what would he (she?!) be called and why?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>IR:</b> I <i>am</i> the Mister Hyde style alter-ego.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My Mr Jekyll style alter-ego is called Norman Jekyll and he works compiling railway timetable information. In his spare time, he enjoys his hobby of compiling historical railway timetable information, with occasional refreshments of weak lemon drink.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>TMWASFAH: </b><i>"</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>If you had a free pick from all of literature of one story by a guest author for a future issue of Penny Dreadnought, what would it be?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>IR:</b> Beowulf. Because it is wonderful it has beasts, and mead and Geats and revenge and dragons and tragedy. And because the author is unknown so the whole issue of royalty payments would be um, moot.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But most of all, because more stories should start: Hwæt! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As writers, we often get asked for boring factual author bios. If you could write an author bio unconstrained by the boundaries of reality and truth, what would it say?"</span></i><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>IR:</b> Iain Rowan is a diligent and disciplined writer.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"What one thing would you like to know about the other Abominable Gentlemen that you currently don't?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>IR:</b> A gentleman never wants to know another gentleman's secrets. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But I do often wonder if the rumours about Mr Everington, the two Tibetans and the manatee have any foundation in truth, whether Mr Ryker really can fly or whether it was some kind of optical illusion that the witnesses saw, and the whole truth about whether Mr Polson has created an additional day between Tuesday and Wednesday which only he can access.</span><br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-AXqGM2-0n1M/Tg7__EO6w-I/AAAAAAAAABY/czWyFFjBsgQ/s1600/iceage+2+for+web2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-AXqGM2-0n1M/Tg7__EO6w-I/AAAAAAAAABY/czWyFFjBsgQ/s200/iceage+2+for+web2.jpg" width="144" /></span></a><br />
<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TMWASFAH: </b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>"What one book of yours would you like to plug to the Penny Dreadnought readership?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>IR:</b> If you have enjoyed my stories in Penny Dreadnought, you'll probably enjoy <b>Ice Age</b>, my collection of strange and chilling stories. Two of the stories in the collection have appeared in PD, but the others haven't, and I think you'll like them.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Buy Ice Age at Amazon: </span><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Ice-Age-ebook/dp/B00596UPDM/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1326911958&sr=8-5" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">US</a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> | </span><a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Ice-Age-ebook/dp/B00596UPDM/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1326911958&sr=8-5" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">UK</a>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-87294733197458091712012-01-11T12:10:00.001-08:002012-01-11T12:12:37.202-08:00Foreword to Volume 2 of Penny Dreadnought...<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB1DEvp5uKBFsPUiW6o1xrxuk4DXJLh6-yAQ0oF80Pcw2dA65GMPprNYTqvjv5C8vAHSxr9rqjOfaaQzIlLdWZfncRhq4BhdTwYDNTERIg-SMpY45ImlRpVXq2EQFD5OCKD7v9w0F3GSE/s400/PD02cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB1DEvp5uKBFsPUiW6o1xrxuk4DXJLh6-yAQ0oF80Pcw2dA65GMPprNYTqvjv5C8vAHSxr9rqjOfaaQzIlLdWZfncRhq4BhdTwYDNTERIg-SMpY45ImlRpVXq2EQFD5OCKD7v9w0F3GSE/s320/PD02cover.jpg" width="240" /></a><br />
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Doubt.</div>
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Imagine you are talking to someone at a party and you don't know if
they are telling the truth or lying. Something isn't quite right about what
they are saying, but you can't put your finger on any obvious falsehood. Feeling
uneasy, you want to leave them and talk to someone else, but you can't just
walk away. In some ways it is worse than if you knew they were lying - at least
if you <i>knew</i> you could call them on
it. It's the doubt that puts you on edge.</div>
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What if you weren't sure if the whole of reality was a lie?</div>
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The theme of this second collection of <i>Penny Dreadnought</i> is 'epistemic doubt'. (When we agreed on this
theme it made me proud to be one of the Abominable Gentleman, by the way. Any <i>normal</i> group of horror writers would
have picked a nice obvious - and commercial - theme like romantically inclined vampires.
But oh no, not <i>us</i>.) 'Epistemic' just
means how we know things, and really there's only one way - through our senses.
Which can deceive us. Or be deceived.</div>
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Descartes mused along these lines once, wondering what he could know
with absolute certainty. He imagined a demon with infinite powers, bent on
deceiving him in every way. Everything he'd ever seen, or remembered seeing,
might have been a manipulation of this demon rather than something real.
Nothing was certain, everything was at doubt (except Descartes himself - if the
demon was manipulating his very thoughts <i>he</i>
still had to exist to have those thoughts - hence "I think therefore I
am"). And how could such a thing be conclusively ruled out? Descartes was
definitely an Abominable Gentleman.</div>
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Scary, no? And fertile soil from which to grow horror stories.
Implicitly or explicitly, the stories in this volume of<i> Penny Dreadnought</i> make you
question just what is real or not in their own particular fictional universes.
And like the smiling but scary man talking to you at a party, they don't give the game away either.</div>
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The modern equivalent is of Descartes is to wonder if everything we've
ever experienced isn't the product of some Matrix-like computer program, rather
than actually real. Although we don't have the computer power to simulate a
reality in such a way yet, there isn't any theoretical reason why it couldn't
be done in the future. And if we can do it one day, we probably will. Many
times in fact. Indeed some modern day descendents of Descartes have reasoned
that, if there are likely to be more artificial realities than real ones, it is
statistically likely that we are in one right now...</div>
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You aren't in fact about to start reading the second issue of <i>Penny Dreadnought</i> at all, but just being
tricked into thinking you are by a sadistic computer programmer or by Descartes
demon. </div>
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<br /></div>
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But thank you for buying it, just the same.<br />
<br />
<br />
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<i>Penny Dreadnought: Descartes' Demon</i> is approximately 23,000 words.</div>
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<br /></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Penny-Dreadnought-Descartes-Demon-ebook/dp/B006VH28ZQ" style="color: #888888; text-decoration: none;">Amazon</a> / <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Penny-Dreadnought-Descartes-Demon-ebook/dp/B006VH28ZQ" style="color: #888888; text-decoration: none;">UK</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/penny-dreadnought-aaron-polson/1108181264" style="color: #888888; text-decoration: none;">B&N</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/121123" style="color: #888888; text-decoration: none;">Smashwords</a></div>
<br class="Apple-interchange-newline" /></div>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-24792292860210042092012-01-10T06:04:00.000-08:002012-01-10T06:04:12.863-08:00Penny Dreadnought: Descartes' Demon<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB1DEvp5uKBFsPUiW6o1xrxuk4DXJLh6-yAQ0oF80Pcw2dA65GMPprNYTqvjv5C8vAHSxr9rqjOfaaQzIlLdWZfncRhq4BhdTwYDNTERIg-SMpY45ImlRpVXq2EQFD5OCKD7v9w0F3GSE/s1600/PD02cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB1DEvp5uKBFsPUiW6o1xrxuk4DXJLh6-yAQ0oF80Pcw2dA65GMPprNYTqvjv5C8vAHSxr9rqjOfaaQzIlLdWZfncRhq4BhdTwYDNTERIg-SMpY45ImlRpVXq2EQFD5OCKD7v9w0F3GSE/s320/PD02cover.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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From the malignant minds of the Abominable Gentlemen come
fearful tales of paralyzing epistemic doubt. What do you do when you turn a
corner and you find yourself where you hadn't intended to go, and you turn back
and find that what's behind you isn't where you came from? When nothing makes
sense, do you doubt your own sanity, or the world’s?</div>
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<br /></div>
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You’ll find no easy answers within the following tales:</div>
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<br /></div>
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“Falling Over” by James Everington</div>
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“All the Pretty Yellow Flowers” by Aaron Polson</div>
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“Ice Age” by Iain Rowan</div>
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“A Face to Meet the Faces that You Meet” by Alan Ryker</div>
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<br /></div>
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<i>Penny Dreadnought: Descartes' Demon</i> is approximately 23,000
words.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Penny-Dreadnought-Descartes-Demon-ebook/dp/B006VH28ZQ">Amazon</a> / <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Penny-Dreadnought-Descartes-Demon-ebook/dp/B006VH28ZQ">UK</a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/penny-dreadnought-aaron-polson/1108181264">B&N</a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/121123">Smashwords</a></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02264075796596433731noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-18911671462664153722011-12-18T11:49:00.001-08:002023-09-09T03:34:44.401-07:00How The Penny Dreadnought Was Born<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">Every town has one, and just because you don't know where it is your town doesn't mean it doesn't exist; it just means </span><i style="background-color: white;">you</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> haven't been invited to be a member yet. The original gentleman's drinking clubs, where smoking is still very much allowed (provided it's a cigar or a pipe), where snifters of brandy are drunk and the world set to rights around a blazing log fire. Whatever the time of year.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">If you ever do get invited to one you might notice, nowadays, how </span><i style="background-color: white;">shabby</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> it all looks round the edges. How there are so few members - even now, after they've finally let the ladies join - that you wonder how it even stays in business. And you might be tempted to think that there must be more to it than meets the eye, to hold romantic notions about how the place stays open, and the real reasons why so few drink there...</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">But you'd be wrong. These clubs are an obscurity and already slipping into history.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">Unless you've entered the </span><i style="background-color: white;">Jeykll And Hyde</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> - for that is the stomping ground of the Abominable Gentlemen.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">One of them, called Everington, steps out his door onto a Nottingham street and walks there - it is his local. But strangely it is </span><i style="background-color: white;">also</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> the local of Dr. Rowan, who lives many miles to the north in Sunderland. And even more strangely it's the local pub to Ryker and Colonel Polson, who live in Kansas towns which don't even </span><i style="background-color: white;">have</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> pubs. All four of them walk to the </span><i style="background-color: white;">Jeykll And Hyde</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">, for gentlemen would never drive themselves.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.myworldshots.com/p1/m/USA/NewYorkCity/Jekyll-and-Hyde-Club-2135.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" height="149" src="http://www.myworldshots.com/p1/m/USA/NewYorkCity/Jekyll-and-Hyde-Club-2135.jpg" width="200" /></span></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">Outside it is recognisably England - cold, damp, clouded over. The old glass windows of the club are warped in places, or frosted over, or made with stained glass. You can see the real world through these windows, but it looks a bit different. Odd.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">It was Ryker who asked the others to meet that night, and they all knew where and when (the Gentleman have the old-fashioned skill of being able to meet for a drink without having to endlessly 'message' each other beforehand). Also present was The Man With A Skull For A Head. No one knew where </span><i style="background-color: white;">he</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> was from - it wasn't that people didn't dare ask, just that he presumably had no vocal chords with which to reply. No one knew how he </span><i style="background-color: white;">drank</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> either, but he stood his round, so no one cared too much either way.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">They were sat in a nook of the club, where there were the comfiest leather chairs, and a log fire. Leather bound books lined the walls. The only sounds were the clatter of billiards being played in the room next door, and knots of wood sparking in the fire.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://profile.ak.fbcdn.net/hprofile-ak-snc4/41799_2240168577_7854_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" src="http://profile.ak.fbcdn.net/hprofile-ak-snc4/41799_2240168577_7854_n.jpg" /></span></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br style="background-color: white;" /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">That night, they were bitter drinkers, in both senses of the word. Pints of Blue Monkey were being drunk, but despite that, the mood was morose. Ryker had started a conversation about what passed for genre fiction in the modern world.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">"Sparkly vampires..." he said, between gritted teeth.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">Everington used some choice words of Anglo Saxon dialect.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">Dr. Rowan spat into the fire.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">Col. Polson almost swallowed his cigar in righteous anger.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">The Man With A Skull For A Head indicated, with some very expressive hand gestures what </span><i style="background-color: white;">he</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> thought of sparkly vampires. In the same wordless manner he also made it be known that he was dry, and that it was Col. Polson's round (he couldn't stand laggards when it came to drinking).</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">"Wouldn't it be great," said Dr. Rowan, "if there was some periodical that published nothing but </span><i style="background-color: white;">classy</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> genre fiction?"</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">"Well written," said Everington. "Creepy."</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">"Original," said Ryker. "Thought provoking."</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">"Stylish," said Col. Polson. "Contemporary."</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">The Man With A Skull For A Head made the international sign language gestures for "erudite" and "literate".</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">"But who could do such a thing?" said Ryker. There were baffled looks all round; Col. Polson threw the stub his cigar into the fire. Outside, the English rain flung itself against the windows.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">The Man With A Skull For A Head made a gesture. They stared at him blankly. He made another.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">Understanding dawned.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">"</span><i style="background-color: white;">We</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> could...." the Abominable Gentlemen said in unison. There was a sudden commotion as the comfy armchairs upon which they'd been reclining were pushed back, watch chains hastily consulted, and coats, hats and canes gathered. The Abominable Gentlemen tipped the man on the door, huddled against the elements, and hailed horse-drawn cabs back to their dwellings in Nottingham, Sunderland, and Kansas. Pencils were sharpened, pens found, dust blown of typewriters. The Gentlemen were writing.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">Back in the </span><i style="background-color: white;">Jeykll And Hyde</i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">, The Man With A Skull For A Head stared blankly at his empty pint glass. He went up to the bar, and placed it on the beer mats near the pumps.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">"Pint of Blue Monkey," he said to the barman. "And a packet of pork scratchings."</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://encrypted-tbn3.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRXyWRez56XPj6mra_PTt8DWr8CR_iOuYhFf6klMDfv8XU2CP1H" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" src="https://encrypted-tbn3.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRXyWRez56XPj6mra_PTt8DWr8CR_iOuYhFf6klMDfv8XU2CP1H" /></span></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Arial; font-size: x-small;"><br />
</span>James Everingtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04717149514440381738noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-71711634151093401012011-12-09T08:19:00.001-08:002011-12-10T09:43:24.628-08:00Foreword to "Introducing Penny Dreadnought..."<br />
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I’m a romantic. There’s no hiding it. I’m too sincere. I’m
too enthusiastic. I can’t play it cool, so I’m just going to come out and tell
you what publishing this first issue of <i>Penny
Dreadnought</i> means to me.</div>
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<br /></div>
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I believe that fiction can matter. I believe it can even be
dangerous, but only if the writer is fearless. That’s not an easy thing. We
tend to be an anxious lot.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
A dreadnought is a battleship, but a literal paraphrase for
“dreadnought” is “fear nothing.” <i>Penny
Dreadnought</i> began as a wish to get my work alongside the most talented and
fearless writers I know. Somehow, I was lucky enough that my first choices all
agreed. And thus began the accursed fraternity of the Abominable Gentlemen.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
These men do not care about false genre boundaries, only
making the best stories they can. They don’t care about the next hot subject,
only their next impossible-to-ignore idea. They’ve put in their dues and know
the rules, so they know exactly when and how to break them.</div>
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<br /></div>
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And they’ve agreed to let me place my stories beside theirs
on a regular basis.</div>
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<br /></div>
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So, I’m very proud to introduce <i>Penny Dreadnought</i>, the insidious indoctrination engine of the
Abominable Gentlemen. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Writers are still adjusting to the idea that when we sit
down at the keyboard, we need only worry about creating the best work possible.
We need not dread pouring our time and hearts into something we can’t get past
gatekeepers with more conservative (or fiscally-focused) aesthetics. In this
climate, I expect our work to only get better. More dangerous.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Stranger.</div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;">-Alan Ryker</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span><br />
<br />
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<span class="apple-style-span"><i><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;">Introducing Penny Dreadnought, Insidious
Indoctrination Engine of the Abominable Gentlemen</span></i></span><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"> is approximately 22,000 words, or 88 paper pages,
and can be purchased at:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Introducing-Dreadnought-Indoctrination-Abominable-ebook/dp/B006JPBNV0">Amazon</a>
/ <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Introducing-Dreadnought-Indoctrination-Abominable-ebook/dp/B006JPBNV0">Amazon
UK</a><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1107907950">Barnes& Noble</a><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><a href="http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/112491">Smashwords</a></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02264075796596433731noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3779376595863319308.post-75351186125716095492011-12-09T08:06:00.001-08:002011-12-10T09:43:43.468-08:00Introducing Penny Dreadnought, Insidious Indoctrination Engine of the Abominable Gentlemen<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzNUIYASUh4P0rndrIpNGkcGsXhyM0MxMPhV2wsFYWPVEu2MsDGDA0UF7F6yxxLk1G9tRGEVetoga9CFNE4gZ-FzvwpPovTKHqsQSRLqK7eFmjo6FJtQKWIHwNEuNvBeo4MXgJJIDHqmo5/s1600/PD1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzNUIYASUh4P0rndrIpNGkcGsXhyM0MxMPhV2wsFYWPVEu2MsDGDA0UF7F6yxxLk1G9tRGEVetoga9CFNE4gZ-FzvwpPovTKHqsQSRLqK7eFmjo6FJtQKWIHwNEuNvBeo4MXgJJIDHqmo5/s320/PD1.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;">From the
malignant minds of the Abominable Gentlemen comes the first volume of <i>Penny Dreadnought</i>. Within these pages
you’ll find the following seeds of madness:</span></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><br />
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial;"><span style="float: none;">“Lilies” by Iain
Rowan</span></span></span><br />
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial;"><span style="float: none;">“Cargo” by Aaron
Polson</span></span></span><br />
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial;"><span style="float: none;">“First Time Buyers”
by James Everington</span></span></span><br />
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial;"><span style="float: none;">“Invasion of the
Shark-Men” by Alan Ryker</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span class="apple-style-span"><i><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial;"><span style="float: none;">Introducing Penny Dreadnought, Insidious
Indoctrination Engine of the Abominable Gentlemen</span></span></i><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial;"> is approximately 22,000 words, or 88
paper pages, and can be purchased at:<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Introducing-Dreadnought-Indoctrination-Abominable-ebook/dp/B006JPBNV0">Amazon</a>
/ <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Introducing-Dreadnought-Indoctrination-Abominable-ebook/dp/B006JPBNV0">Amazon
UK</a><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1107907950">Barnes& Noble</a><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><a href="http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/112491">Smashwords</a></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02264075796596433731noreply@blogger.com0